Rebecka on your 18th birthday


In our country there are certain legal implications as you become 18.  Some of the official responsibilities of your life move from us, as your parents, to you as an adult, in an administrative way. -- in reality, this process isn't equally connected to the calendar. 

Your mother and I have understood that this responsibility hasn't lain completely in our hands the last while.  Although we maybe haven't always dealt with this development as we might have, or expressed our acceptance of it as well as we could -- Rebecka, we are immensely proud of your courage and will to independently chart the course of your life. We want you to know that you have our full support -- either with or without our involvement --  and that we believe you will honorably make the most out of your capacity for life -- the ‘life’ you began with us. Although we haven't said it so often, we want you to know that you have been a wonderful daughter, and have enriched our lives more than you could know.

It would be dishonest for us to imply that we haven't sometimes found it frustrating to note that our capacity for influence hasn't been as significant as we have wished .. but we understand that this is the natural course in adolescent life, and we can promise from the bottom of our hearts that this hasn't diminished our enormous love for you and our wishes for the very best for you as you step in your future as an adult .

Likely the next 50 years of your life will teach you, as it has taught us, that none of us 'call all the shots' in the major things that make up the story of our lives. But never underestimate the capacity for beauty and value in the many developments in life that are clearly outside our control.  Making right choices is only a small part of successful life -- Even more important is the challenge of honorably dealing with the forces of chance, of fortune and misfortune, success and failure -- both on your part, and then the challenge of understanding and appreciation for the whims of fate, in those around you.  Accept the unchangeable and unforeseeable in life -- and do your best to draw the best, most valuable and finest from even the experiences that, if you could, you would have chosen to be different.

Tomorrow may not seem to be all that different from yesterday, Rebecka, but with each new day, your life IS different. Every time we place a 'today' into the archive of 'yesterday', even if we may not notice, life HAS become richer – this is the wonderful miracle of time.  Don't forget it!

With love from

Your mom and your dad